SHARE. 35 Dirty Jokes To Tell Your Friends That You Can’t Help But Laugh At. He went to Dr. Geezer's clinic and this is what happened. Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak I can hardly see!" Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom, and even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex with her. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better. Nurse asks, "Do you think that will help?" We also have jokes about doctors, hospitals and other funny jokes categories, so make sure to check them as well. Enjoy our funny medical jokes and puns. A: Hopefully not your doctor. Q: What's the difference between a marriage and a mental hospital? To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. << See All of our Jokes Categories Here! Get a lawyer. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. It will be better in two weeks." Q: What happened when the man tried to search for information about impotence on the Internet? Moral of story: Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an old "Geezer ", One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. Oh come on, you can admit it. Q: Did you hear about the optometrist that fell into his lens grinding machine? You got your vision back! Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth." A: Three. A: He made a spectacle of himself Read on these relatable funny medical jokes. ", A stranger walks up to an Egyptian man at the Cairo bazaar and offers to sell him contraband Viagra for 100 Egyptian pounds. There are two types of people in the world. All sorted from the best by our visitors. ", A young woman was taking golf lessons and had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Vote: share joke. See TOP 10 doctor one liners. They aren't yours. "Nonsense," says the husband, "I can remember a dish of ice cream." A: A God doesn't think he is an orthopedic surgeon. When they get home, the wife says, "Dear, will you please go to the kitchen and get me a dish of ice cream? Let’s be real: life can be hard. Medical Doctor Pick Up Lines! "Doc! The stranger says, "How about 10?" An old geezer, who had been a retired farmer for a long time became very bored and decided to open a medical clinic. Dr replies, "No but it will keep the sheets off his legs!" When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Those who love dirty jokes, and those who are lying. Bloke in hospital with 60% burns, Dr. says, "Give him two Viagra." Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: He put a sign up outside that said: "Get your treatment for $500 - if not cured get back $1,000." "Well," says the wife, "I'd also like some strawberries and whipped cream on it." That will be $500." When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that the poor guy has tried practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. Not all jokes need to be family friendly and G-rated. The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." Q: What's the medical term for owning too many dogs? he asks. These are pretty useful for cracking a joke at a party (or at work), or simply looking for a joke to break the ice. A: One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what he treats. That will be $500." Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! ", Bloke in hospital with 60% burns, Dr. says, "Give him two Viagra." David jumped in and saved him, and the medical director came to know of his heroic act. New generic drug replacement for Viagra – it's called Mycoxaflopin. Doctor: "We have good news and bad news for you, David. Dr Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything." I hung him there to dry. by Team Scary Mommy. That will be $500." Q: What do you call 2 orthopedic doctors reading an EKG? "Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. << We have over 150 Categories of Jokes on our Main Page! A: A double blind study! One day, John suddenly dived into the deep end of the swimming pool. It REALLY WORKS! The good news is that we are going to discharge you because you have regained your senses, since you are able to jump in and save another patient you are now a normal person. Returning visitor? Joke has 77.33 % from 187 votes. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. And maybe write that down so you won't forget?" "How come you are sweating?"
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